Meow, meow, meow *

Alternate title: My complaint Becomes my Clarification.

I have always had a problem with “The Secret” because the emphasis seemed to be too much on manifestations rather than on the ability to feel good in your life.

I just read an article written by a woman whose parents raised her to understand that thought creates reality according to the Secret teachings, using affirmations. She (subconsciously) set out to create a Superbaby by doing all the right things and then had a child with a chromosomal disorder and the resulting severe disabilities, and was then disillusioned with the law of attraction as she understood it.

The key to understanding what she understood versus the Law of Attraction as Abraham-Hicks teaches it is in her use of the words “fault” and “blame”. When the guiding principle is to achieve a thought which creates a feeling of well-being (at the moment of NOW) is the basis of “thought creates reality”, there is no blame, no fault attached to whatever happens, only how you feel about it.

When you think that your conscious thoughts are creating a specific, controllable outcome or manifestation, you are destined for disappointment.

Why?

To understand this, it is necessary to understand three things.

The first is that the Law of Attraction does not match your thoughts so much as your feelings. It is not enough to say the words, “I have everything I want”, you must also convince yourself of the concept so well that you feel as if you have everything you want and behave as if you do.

Since we are complex beings with a long history of repeating the thoughts that caused us to believe that we do not have everything we want, it takes a lot of practice in a lot of circumstances to begin to shift that belief consistently enough to hold that understanding for any length of time.

I don’t say that affirmations are worthless, only that they must be constructed to achieve the feeling we are aiming for and re-constructed whenever they stop achieving that feeling.

So the first understanding is that it is the feeling that the LoA matches, the second is that we have a backlog of belief that is counter to what we truly want to believe that needs to be sorted out and shifted.

The third understanding is that we, as creators, are not limited to the consciousness that we believe inhabits the bodies we wear. We are also non-physical beings, “spirit” inextricably woven throughout and beyond our bodies. This is our eternal element. I am not sure there is a good way to put this into words but to call it spirit, soul, inner-being, God, common consciousness–all of those touch it somewhat. As such, there is always an element of that consciousness’ creative direction in what manifests in our lives. It is my belief/understanding that that consciousness is communal, that we are One.

To return for a moment to the article I referred to, consider that the child born with chromosomal anomalies has chosen, on this non-physical level, to experience the life she has been born into. Not only she has, but her mother has agreed to it on that same level of non-physicality, they have “contracted” to experience  this together.  This experience includes the mother’s disenchantment with the path of the “Secret” and her subsequent choosing to follow Pema Chodron’s Buddhism.  The thing I find interesting about this is that the Mom has chosen a set of thoughts which create a feeling of well-being. Now where have I heard that before…

One of the things that appeals to me so much about the LoA as Abraham teaches it is that nothing is wrong. Choosing a thought that feels good, feels good, choosing a thought that doesn’t feel good shows you ever more clearly over time what you want to feel instead. Feelings just ARE, free yourself to feel without blaming yourself for feeling it, or for thinking what you thought to get there. The goal is to expand yourself, to grow, and to feel as good about it as you can at any given moment.
I have everything I want right now because I have the ability to choose a thought that feels better as soon as I decide I want to, and because I know that being dissatisfied (wanting more and better than having what I have) means I always have something to look forward to.

* When I was a child my mother would say this when we complained about inconsequentials.

“Everything is always working out for me”

Abraham always corrects people who say,

“Everything always works out for me” to

“Everything is always working out for me”.

Intellectually I always understood this, in the way of creating a more effective affirmation, as bringing your outcome into the present moment. In a practical sense, though, I never felt the difference.

Today (showerthoughts, of course) I tried to see what the 2 statements were really saying.

The first implies that IN THE END you will have the outcome you want, despite the fact that you can’t see right now how it can/will come about.

The second implies that since it is happening right now as well as lining up to “conclude” (if you can use that word about anything in life) at some point, if you are alert to it, you might see evidence of steps that are happening to take you where you want to go.

(I believe that this is the meaning of the scripture, “Seek and ye shall find”. If you are looking for it, you will be able to find it.)

So the essential difference in subtext is,

“I will be happy when this happens and I just have to take it on faith that it will happen, eventually”

versus,

“I am happy that this is happening, in part, right now and I am comforted by the evidence that I see that it is happening, stepwise.”

Now obviously there are people who are capable of suspending disbelief comfortably, (ie having faith), although I don’t believe I am acquainted with any. I, and most of the people I know get along much better with evidence, even if it is only the evidence that no one else would accept: that of your own “knowing”, also known as guidance.

As an example:

I was playing Freecell and I was stuck-no moves possible. I read (a Facebook) thread, left and realized that I knew what (commenter) was saying about when you share your problem with someone you also offer them a connection to the solution and I came back to “like” it. I did that and went back to my game and there were 2 obvious plays which opened the game up entirely.

I “knew” that this “sign” was a follow-up to my last post here about being a teacher. It is not possible NOT to be a teacher because it is not possible not to be a learner as they are the two sides of the same coin.

As I was writing this note, I stepped out for a cigarette and  received several more confirmations that I am on the right track; I was warm despite the fact that it is 0 F, I saw a bird eating the food left out for them but haven’t seen any eating for weeks now and have been wanting to, etc.

These small confirmations are so easy to ignore and/or negate if you are not focused on finding them and giving them credence, or if you need to justify their truth to others who are lurking for the chance of saying “confirmation bias!”.  If you can be satisfied in yourself that this small sign has meaning for you and that you know what it is, there isn’t the smallest need to ‘fess up to anyone else.  I sometimes make up a story about what I am doing and why if I feel the need to respond to someone’s “But why are you doing that?”, but more often I just say, “Eh, I just feel like it.” (Which, by the way, is a hard thing to argue against, :)!)

So, if you decide to affirm, “Everything is always working out for me” be sure to be looking for the small evidences you are being shown.

A Body Analogy

I occurs to me that our bodies, the mutual creation of Spirit and nature, are wonderful symbols of the process of Life and the roles that Spirit and physical life-experience play.

Let me begin with the analogy of eating and digestion as the taking in of life experience.  You might think I will start with tasting your food, but actually we need to go farther back.

Your physical body represents the vehicle of your Spirit (your Wholeness?) travelling through The Physical Experience. As such, it is aware of/connected to/acting in partnership with the part of you that is not in physical form and “remembers” (or continues to be aware of, perhaps) what you wanted to play with in this particular experience.

So the first part of our analogy is actually when you have an energetic desire for something, which Abe refers to as a “rocket of desire” (see http://treeatlarge.com/revisiting-rockets-of-desire/ ) which in the body analogy is the desire of the body to experience food. At some point you become consciously aware of this desire and real-ize that you are hungry.  If you feel like following this real-ization (which many times we suppress because we want to focus our attention elsewhere) you begin sifting and sorting out what form you would most like this desire to be satisfied with.  Do you want to eat out?, or order in?, make a meal? or just have a snack and put off total fulfillment for awhile?  Once you have settled on the form of the experience you want to have, you begin putting actions to the thoughts, dressing to go out, making a phone call, assembling the ingredients, or possibly just opening the fridge to see what instantly edible food you have.

Notice that you have not as yet had any manifestation of food at this point, and yet you have been in the process of creating a reality for some time. Hmm, remember that next time your manifestation seems to be slow in coming…

Now, if you have chosen a more elaborate experience than a snack or ordering in, you have more pointed focusing to do: what are you making/ordering, what will you do in order to prepare the meal or while you are waiting to be served, etc.

Finally, you begin to eat. You begin by savoring the aromas, tasting this bit or that bit, chewing on it to begin the process of assimilating it into your body. If your are honoring the experience consciously, you are deciding what you like best about this meal, enjoying the textures as well as the flavors, deciding whether the spicing was correct or how you might improve it, etc.

Once you swallow, it seems like the experience is over, and yet of course it is not. Your body now begins the same process of breaking it down into more usable bits, separating out what it can use and what will be passed along. In the END (*groan*), you eliminate what what no longer serves you, having taken from it everything of value to you at this time.

Now in this analogy, food is nourishment to your body, it allows you to grow. Experience is “food for thought” to your life, it nourishes you and allows you to grow. If you don’t allow yourself to partake, of either food or experience, you cannot grow and eventually that creates pain or suffering of one sort or another. If you refuse to let go of what no longer serves you, again eventual suffering.  It is a continual process that must continually be repeated, each experience is a meal and when you are really done, well, you ARE really done…

As important as this analogy can be in getting a balanced view of your life as a process, I will note here that you can go a long time without eating. You can even go a relatively long time without drinking. But the next analogy shows you how important this other thing is, even compared to eating/life experience.

I am talking about breathing, of course. Breath is life; breath is also, analogously, your connection to Spirit. It is constant, it happens without your conscious participation (unless you choose to focus on doing it cooperatively with your body), it is always up to date, it is ESSENTIAL, it is your essence. You can count on it so completely that you can even take it for  granted and it NEVER abandons you until you are done with it.

And then you become it completely…

 

 

The “Aha!” Junkie

Hello, my name is Laurie. I am a recovering “Aha!” addict.
During most of the many years I have been “on the spiritual path”, I looked forward to those “Aha!” moments, collected them, treasured them.
I signed up for courses seeking them, spent weekends doing shamanic journeys, communed with nature barefoot…

For many years I invested myself in becoming a Reiki master, a flower essence practitioner, a Medium, a dabbler in essential oils, etc, so that I would have a thing to share, to teach, and something I could point to and say, “I am this thing!”

All for the thrill, the rush of an insight high.

And then, gradually, I stopped caring what were cool and enlightened things to do because they were not feeding me as consistently as I wanted, literally and figuratively. Instead I have been seeking the biggest rush of all, everyday happiness. In retrospect, I see that the last year and a half I have scaled my expectations “down” into smaller and smaller pieces, until I finally realized that the big insights are things like, “Aha! I am tired!” and, “Aha! I am bored with this task!” And it is working! I am MUCH happier.

Don’t get me wrong, it is wonderful to feel the rush of an “Aha!” and not a thing to be discarded, and nothing I have gone through was wrong or wasted. it was the right time for that experience and brought me to where I am now. But to finally get it that knowing myself without regard to any outside influence is so much more rewarding than any momentary insight high!

Abraham says that the “rush” we feel when we catch up to ourselves is fun, but the real idea is to stay close enough so that you are not feeling the rush. I finally understand. For me, that rush was not so much enlightenment as overwhelm, but I never stayed there long enough to recognize it. Now I am staying there long enough to feel that it is all normal.

“We’ve Got You” Abraham

Last night my sister sent me an Abraham snippet entitled “Until the path is blatantly obvious, there is nothing for you to do”. I thought that would be good to hear, so I tried playing it. Twice. All I heard was blah, blah, blah. You know like when you read and re-read a paragraph and then realize you have no idea what it said?
Yeah, like that.
This morning as I was redirecting my attention from an unwanted scenario I was finding it “sticky”, my mind kept slipping back to it. Even when I was actively considering something else, I could feel it hovering in the wings.

I remembered Abe saying not to be afraid of our thoughts, and that distracted me enough to leave the other behind. I thought, “If we are determining our vibration from what we focus upon, why shouldn’t certain thoughts naturally activate some fear?”

And then I thought about the scenario I had been contemplating and realized that there are billions of people in that circumstance (who wear glasses) and that thing almost never happens to any of us.

Suddenly I got an image of myself as a little speck upon a huge, well, it looked like a blob, lol, but it was an image of me compared to my higher self/inner being. I realized that both parts are affecting the LOA, pulling as it were, and the “blob” of my non-physical self is exerting so much more “pull” than I am, and ALL POSITIVE.

THAT is the river of well-being Abraham describes, the ocean, the universe, the eternity, the all-that-is-ness of well being. I saw myself sitting in the “hand of God” and really understood that if I did nothing, thought nothing, that I would be carried in that hand, by that river, towards everything that I desire.

But I don’t want to do nothing and think nothing. Few of us do. But if I understand that since the LOA is delivering all that I desire to my non-physical self (and therefore mostly in non-physical form) if I were to be looking at all times for the ways it is manifesting in my life (which will be in those places where I am not holding it away with my resistance to the flow) then I will begin to see it and make it manifest in greater abundance or real-ize it, as Abe says.

But even better, if I can just relax enough to stop struggling most of the time, the current will carry me along. And when I get better at relaxing and things are showing up for me, then I will feel like looking for all the good in my life and it won’t feel like “efforting”.

This is why and how it can be effortless.
Thanks Kath, your Abe snippet did the job without me even hearing it. smile emoticon

Revisiting ‘Rockets of Desire’

This is a phrase of Abraham’s that has always caused me issues. What is it anyway?  Why describe it as a rocket?  And more importantly, how does it help me to feel better knowing about it?

Suddenly I see it so differently than ever before.  A rocket of desire is the immediate response you have when something affects you, either positively or negatively. It is the first, call it electrical impulse, you generate on a feeling level and shoots off from you, lighting you up for Non-Physical (called a rocket because that is what it “looks” like to Non-Physical) . It is their call to action. So, to use Abraham’s usual example, when someone is rude to you, that first moment of reaction (taken aback, negatively impacted) shoots off, it is a vibration that carries all the signatures of how you feel and how it compares to how you want to feel (this is what Abraham calls Step 1- “You ask”, vibrationally).  In the next moment is the part where you consciously recognize how you feel and choose how to respond.  IN BETWEEN these 2 moments, Source has created a vibrational reality that matches the elements of how you want to feel. This is what Abraham calls Step 2 -”It is answered”, vibrationally.

Step 3 is what Abraham calls “allowing” or “lining up” with what you want, or “aligning yourself with your Inner Being”, and is the Step most of us can’t get our heads around. Now bear with me while I explain my new clarity about this.

Source has infinite experience, infinite creativity, infinite resources, yes? Source can solve any problem better than you can, yes? So, and here is the important bit, inherent within the rocket is the solution!

Follow me on this. Inherent within the rocket of desire is the solution, which Source got and created into vibrational reality instantly. It is now done and on it’s way to you as soon as you acheive the vibrational frequency it exists at!

This is what Abraham has lately been calling “preparing the environment” for “real-izing” (bringing it into physical, manifesting it).  Ok, fine, how does this help?

Imagine for a moment that Source is a company that specializes in smoothing the way for you, taking care of the details so you can get your primary business done (think rock star making requests for backstage specialties to be supplied). Let’s call them The Fiduciary. Your rocket of desire imparted all the information that The Fiduciary needs. They are on it, it is done, now if you want that thing on your time schedule, it is your job to find out where they put your stuff and you won’t get it by screwing your eyes closed and screaming, “Where’s my stuff!” (okay, this is where my example of the rock star begins to fail…).

The Fiduciary insists on playing a bit of fun, something like, “If I were the cup of coffee that would make you happy, where would I be?”  They will give you clues via your feelings like “warmer” and “colder”, but it is up to you to suss out what warmer and colder FEEL like. Sometimes this is hard, because you are used to looking around for stuff instead of feeling for it.

But what if you could let go of the need to find the cup of coffee? What if you knew that the cup of coffee would be delivered to your hand if you just did your own thing while you were waiting? (Now we come back to the rock star…)

As soon as I got this this morning, I remembered a time almost 20 years ago that I was up late (3 am) and looked out of the window to see flames shooting out of the windows of my car in the driveway. I never once wondered how I should put out that fire. I knew that this was a job for the Fire Department, so I called them and left it in their hands, knowing that help would come as soon as they could because I had given them all the information they needed (like how to find the driveway). While I was waiting, I did not fuss, or cry, or worry. I knew it was taken care of the best way possible, so I enjoyed the sight of flames shooting out of the windows of my car (feels weird to say that, I am laughing so hard right now!). Really, how often do you get to enjoy that?

So instead of looking around for your stuff, you could ask and answer yourself the question, “What will it be like when the solution to this problem shows up? How will I feel? In what part of my current existence do I already feel that way?” And then put all of your attention there, so that you are a vibrational match for your coming solution.

The easy way, however, would be to recognize that The Fiduciary is fulfilling your desires and you can just enjoy watching the flames while you are waiting…

In Your Power

Being in your power means knowing yourself. More importantly it means trusting that you do; that you will know whether you like a thing or don’t, or that you will figure it out over time; that you can trust that your ideas and feelings are giving you good information and you can spend NO time second guessing it.  this is how life becomes effortless.

To recapitulate:

Step One-  You know who you are moment by moment by recognizing how you are feeling and whether you want to feel that way or you don’t.

Step Two- Trust that those feelings are the best guidance you can have.  Don’t waste your energy on second-guessing yourself, just soothe those voices that say, “But what if…” by reminding them that you will know as clearly at the next moment as you do now and that at any given moment your paths are few and easy to choose among.

If you do not feel a clear impulse one way or another (“But i don’t know what I want!”),  rejoice, because this is one of those times when you can choose anything and the experience will show you!

Repeat until you feel yourself becoming shiny and manageable.

P.S.  Flower essences, meditation, nature and creativity will all help you to feel better while you are working out how to pay attention to what you are feeling moment by moment.

 

Divine discontent

A perfect example of Divine discontent is the desire of a woman in late pregnancy to just give birth and “get this over, already”.  It is the proper maturation of the experience at just the right time to make a necessary transition.  She is in tune with the process, she is in tune with the child within her.

Springtime is another good example.  When the sun begins to return, our hearts are lifted and we begin to anticipate the end of the cold weather.  By the time nice weather rolls around we are energized, primed for the growth that is happening all around us to take root within us.  It is a time to consciously allow the expansion that is “in the air”.

There are many times in our lives when we feel Divine discontent, and it is important to understand the role that it plays. Do we need to distinguish this feeling of having outgrown our situation from the discontent that arises from putting our attention on what we don’t want, that thing that Abraham calls “beating the drum of unwanted”?  How do you tell one from the other? Is there a difference? Good question.  This is the place where discernment is the best tool.

Discernment is the ability to monitor yourself:  your thoughts, your feelings, your intuition, your bodily reactions and to “test drive” potential solutions.  How does it feel to think about doing x solution or y solution?  I recently had the opportunity to consider moving to the nearest “big city” and live with or nearer to some of my children (who are truly my best friends).  At first the idea filled me with such a feeling of joy, I caught fire with the idea.  The thought of living in a place where so many interesting things were happening, where there was likely to be a group of people more on my wavelength, where there were multiple coffee shops within walking distance! LOL!

Yet after a few hours thought about logistics, I began to realize (discernment) that what excited me the most was really the sense of freedom from what I was living, and THAT was something I really wanted to accomplish without giving up what I already had.  So I began to look at what would help me to feel better right here, right now.  For inspiration, I looked at the whiteboard on my fridge which holds some of my favorite bits of Abraham advice.

“Appreciate what you have.

Look forward with eagerness  to what is coming.

DO what you look forward to.

Relax about it.”

As I thought about what I look forward to, I realized that most of what was on my list were tasks!

  • Figure out how to earn enough money to support my house alone.
  • Get skinny.
  • Finish painting the downstairs.

Geez, no wonder I felt dispirited, de-energized and trapped.  Where was “Go to Scotland”?  “Meet interesting people”?  “Really enjoy being in my body”?  Of these three, I could be doing two of them right now!  I had plainly been “beating the drum” of  “I don’t have enough money”. “I’m not good enough” and “I have to finish what I start”.  Taking a step back gave me the opportunity to see these things differently, and to recognize and try on some directions to see where I would rather go.

It is fair to say that in any case of unhappiness, some of it has arisen from “beating the drum” or habitually putting one’s attention on the aspects of a situation that are not what we want.  It is also fair to say that some of it is Divine discontent, meaning that at some level of our Being it is time to move on and grow.  Discernment, the ability to read your feeling signals  and be honest with yourself about what you truly want (even if you think you “shouldn’t” want that) is the tool that will allow you to make sense of what is going on and what you feel like doing about it.

Since there is an element of both kinds of discontent in any unhappiness, it serves to see it all as Divine discontent.  In this context it is natural, it is right, for us to find the gift of understanding and use it to nurture our true desires.

 

 

inner dialogue

I shared a Facebook post complaining about some subject and the unfairness with which it was being treated, probably by a governmental institution (?).  Honestly, I don’t remember the subject, but I remember that it twanged a note of victimhood in me at the time.  Very quickly I became uncomfortable with having shared it.
I wouldn’t even have posted this in my blog but for the fact that as I was looking at the draft, I managed to hit the right buttons to share it.  I am leaving it up because I took that a sign…

 

  • Tree at Large Since I posted this I have been a having a little internal dialogue about it.
    Self: If I am, as I believe, the creator of my own reality, through my intention, thoughts, feelings and focus of attention, then why would I subscribe to and propagate the fearfulness embodied in this statement?
  • Tree at Large Other part of Self: Well, it could have been said better, but since it caught my eye, I know that there is something in it for me to evaluate that reflects some belief of mine. I think it stimulated the part of me that wants complete freedom. Sometimes I think that I don’t have complete freedom.
  • Tree at Large S: Complete freedom would include the agencies above having complete freedom as well, right? And the protection of that freedom you want would be assured by the power of your focused thought, right?
  • Tree at Large OPoS: Hmmm, yes, I think so. So I guess this was sort of a pre-emptive strike against interference in my freedom. Which is rather a chip on my shoulder, making the assumption that the enemy IS there to take a shot at it.
  • Tree at Large Self: So what do we do about it? Take it down or let it stand?
  • Tree at Large OPoS: It doesn’t really matter, if I can make peace with the issue it raised. If this statement and it’s assumptions were a jar of capers, it would not get in my apple pie unless I put it there by focusing my attention on it.
  • Tree at Large OPoS: Besides I can always decide to take it down. New choices are always available.

The Basics/ The Whole Story

There is no one in the universe that has the power to control my feelings, except me.

There is no one in the universe who has the power to control my thoughts, except me.

There is no one in the universe who has the power to control my intention, except me.

Therefore, there is no one in the universe who has the power to control the way I experience my life, my reality, except me.

And in exerting my power to choose I choose to select thoughts which support feeling good and loving myself and my life.

In choosing to see the love and the power and the gifts within myself, I am choosing to see the love and the power and the gifts of this planet and all that share in it; people, animals, plants, insects, elements and spirits.

In choosing to see and celebrate the health and well-being of, the growth and the evolution in myself and my life, I am choosing to see the health and well-being, the growth and evolution of the times, the ecology and this moment of evolution.

In exerting my power of choice to feel good, I choose to become a channel of the Source of all love and well-being, of all gifts and comfort.

I choose to see in others what strength and beauty and value they have forgotten or discounted in themselves during the play that they are enacting at the moment.

I choose to see their eternal selves and the perspective that brings.

I choose to embrace all of this to bring myself aliveness and joy, which cannot but overflow and change the world by making itself available more and more, one person by one person.

I believe it is true that the microcosm reflects the macrocosm, or as it is often said, “As above, so below: as within, so without”.  Our choices to feel good and be powerful nourish the physical world by improving who we are and what we have to offer.